Your Child’s Anxious Feelings: 5 Things You Can Do Now to Help

As a mom with anxiety I use various coping mechanisms (breathing, essential oils, exercise) to help keep my anxious feelings in check. I have used some of these methods to help my kids when I notice they are anxious about something (either specifically or in general). For the record, I am not a therapist nor an “expert”. I am simply a mom who is sharing from experience what has worked and what has not worked for my kids.

Here are five things you can do to help your kids feel less anxious:

Meditation

Our journey of mindfulness began with my brother talking to my daughter about meditation at a young age. At the time, I didn’t fully embrace it UNTIL a rough car trip where the kids were having melt-down after melt-down. I played a guided meditation app through my phone and both kids calmed down and my son who never naps, took a nap. After that, I started researching various guided meditation scripts/apps.

Guided meditation has helped my daughter who has a hard time shutting off her mind at night. Thanks to these scripts she has been able to fall asleep faster. My favorites are the relaxation scripts on Green Child Magazine. It helps to play relaxing music in the background when reading one of these scripts.

If you have a child who is anxious about school/day care, they have motivating scripts that you can read to empower your child too!

Certain days, I can’t read to them or maybe they are nervous on the way to the doctor; you can play a prerecorded guided meditation through your phone. I really like these from New Horizon: New Horizon on YouTube and or their stories on Spotify.

Calm-Down Space

Both kids have their own calm-down space where they can go whenever they need quiet-time. It doesn’t need to be fancy, just somewhere cozy where they know they are safe and their request for alone time will be respected. My son has a chair next to sensory books that he looks through when he needs a moment. My daughter has a chair with pillows with flippy-sequins that help her calm down by drawing or writing on them.

Yoga

I have always used a good cardio-sweat-session to help me control my anxious feelings. With my kids, I have them signed up for different activities (tennis, basketball), take them to the park and make sure they get enough time to play outside. Anything that helps them use some of that extra energy.

Another thing that has helped us is taking the kids on one-on-one walks. They open up and we learn a lot about what is going on in school on these walks. It helps that they have a parent’s undivided attention and I think that is what helps with their willingness to share feelings.

Yoga has been a great way to practice mindfulness, improve their overall calmness and focus. Plus, it helps with their strength and flexibility. We love Cosmic Kids Yoga and watch their free videos on either Amazon or YouTube. This year, I am trying to get us ready earlier to allow for enough time to do one yoga session before we leave for school. While I have no data to share about how it has helped them focus at school, I can say that leaving the house after their yoga practice is much calmer. That is a big win for us.

Journaling

This is something new we have been doing to help get our feelings out onto paper. My daughter is seven-years-old and writes down three things she is grateful for, daily. My son who is four and cannot yet write, will draw pictures. The reason we keep a gratitude journal is to plant seeds of positivity and gratitude in our minds. The kids know that by planting these seeds the positive thoughts keep growing and help keep the negative/scary thoughts shrink and become smaller.

Books

We use books a lot to help us understand our feelings. Whether the topic in our lives is bullying/hygiene/friendship…there is always a book that can explain better than I can! Here are some of my favorites (these are affiliate links…I make a commission at no cost to you):

• What to Do When You Worry Too Much: A Kid’s Guide to Overcoming Anxiety (What-to-Do Guides for Kids): This is a great book/workbook for older kids (says grades 1-7)
• My Strong Mind: A Story About Developing Mental Strength : I love this book as it encourages a growth mindset. (ages 4-8)
• Angry Octopus: A relaxation story : When my daughter would have a hard time managing her anger, this story helped her learn how to relax her big feelings. (the book says for ages 5-10 but we started reading to her at age 4 and now that she is 7 she is close to outgrowing it).
• Calm-Down Time : a great board book for toddlers that teaches them about feelings and how to help calm-down.
• B is for Breathe: The ABCs of Coping with Fussy and Frustrating Feelings : Another great book for younger kids about feelings and coping.

As far as what doesn’t work…for me it’s when someone tells me to “calm down.” I always tell my husband no one has ever calmed down simply by being told to do so.

What helps your children (or yourself!) feel less anxious?

With love,

Shahla